Swagatouille

by J Eazy

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released October 1, 2013

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Track Name: Swagatouille
[hook]
swagatouille sw-swagatouille
pardon my french but i'm going fucking crazy
cooking up these beats like my name is swagatouille
flow raw like sushi but i'm hot like swagatouille
yeah i'm pretty looney got my tunes like snoopy
my life is a movie this is no i love lucy!
i don't wear no gucci i don't have no groupies
but this is swagatouille this shit is swagatouille

[verse 1]
j eazy coming with the mixtape of the century
scratch that best mixtape ever this a masterpiece
therapists surrounding me questioning my sanity
just because i'm seeing new dimensions of reality
so insane i think stuck inside a dali piece
cooking swagatouille literally no analogy
yes indeed i'm the best chef in this whole galaxy
thirty stars from michelin your shit worse than applebees
god damn damn i'm just tryna keep it real though
love myself so much my ego has its own zip code
riding on this track like its a motherfucking railroad
keep it underground yelling fuck you to jim crow
rap is my temple but i'm rather sinful
bringing in the banknotes by the whole benzful
fact check my raps hit me with a polygraph
girl let's see your tail wag border collie swag

[hook]

j eazy coming with the verse of the century
scratch that best verse ever this a masterpiece
wrote it 2 years ago back when i was seventeen
ima go in, y'all better listen carefully
itsy bitsy spiders can't compete with the emperor
illest in the music and my skill's are unforgettable
limericks and hissy fits are little shit to my repertoire
my vision is progressive and my flow is oh so avant garde
andrew W K taught me how to party hard
i'm a star find my name in concrete on the boulevard
pockets big and large cause they're filled with many benjamins
my arrogance is only rivaled by my own intelligence
intuition tells me i'm the master of the universe
puny twerps can't match me i'm descended straight from lucifer
i plant juniper to save the earth on every sunday
i once outran a jaguar and then went and bought a hyundai
the wonders of the world man i wonder if i could
turn the world upside down and then engrave it into wood
i'm misunderstood my history's a mystery
miserys my company and jewelrys my industry
victims of my viciousness will find no rest in graveyards
napalm is the language that i speak when i am angered
players laughs in dangers face but haters cannot take it
gangsters sleep beneath the streets in metal sheeted blankets
crack of dawn or dawn of crack there really is no difference
dawn till dusk i'm cooking it within my chemist's kitchen
dentists can't compete with me i've knocked more teeth than frazier
tasers can't subdue me because i respond with lasers
many barracudas can be found in the bermudas
judas was a junkie who gave jesus up to shoot up
heroin is heavenly but that's just what my friends say
wisdom's overrated that's what i learned from my sensei
gunplay is an artform and i am its one picasso
suave with the ladies cause i learned from johnny bravo
fairy tales inspire me to live life to the fullest
scheming for that porridge out in goldilocks's forest
mullets made a comeback back when i was spitting icebergs
now i'm spitting lightning with the certainty of snipers
certainly i'm hot because i set my home on fire
50 said that sleep is for the broke i'm never tired
i'm only seventeen but my mind is so mature
i'm honestly the best fucking rapper to occur
life is so surreal man i'm hanging by a thread
the picture perfect day is one where i don't end up dead!
Track Name: Dope Raps (ft. DFi)
[verse 1 - DFi]
drop the ball like the golden calf
respond to the stupidity and call it wrath
dead fad but i bring it back
midas steak cut me some slack
atlas on my shoulder yet im pushing boulders
never grow older hells freezing over
pigs fly fuck roger waters
floyd mayweather punch his daughters
cold wrap warm you up with a compress
communist steel you can ask jeff
take dubra sell the bacardi
everybodys equal now its a party
stalin smiling burning the balkans
curse the georgians curse on the falcons
reppin pats its a world tour
beat jeff but that was 04

[hook]
oh my god this song is so sick
this beats so hot its got me losing my shit
maybe i should study or go to my next class
nah ill just relax and listen to these dope raps

[verse 2 - J Eazy]
pull up on the block that's that 860
this flow aint composed for the radio
no! this is just me and my bro
wiling out writing out some powrfl prose
we outta control rolling in a lambo
with tinted windows and them harikari doors
get up off the floor we ain't holding back
breaking status quos we amazing yo
lay your ass pancake flat on the mat
cause we going for that tko
no faking though you think i'm baking
cause i'm constantly making dough
spit a bakers dozen hit on the bakers cousin
call up lindsay lohan tryna butter up her muffins
alright i admit that i like mean girls
but shit man who the hell doesn't?

[hook]

[Verse 3 - DFi]
victoria justice dare i discuss this
will i even post this
buy me some samosas fuck scoliosis
i love roller coasters
oh lord jesus it's a fire
burn the castle burn the spire
keep it coming up its a staircase
shots, first floor chase
chicks want dick cause they know code
pokemon its just poke and moan
blastoise bitch its a politoad
she acting cold now i'm on the road
ti-89 so we solve it all
it's a carnival run the stall
its avon what do you say mom?
stop, check your homes for radon

[hook]

[verse 4 - J Eazy]
welcome to the world that resides inside my mind
listen to my rhymes tryta see what you might find
sit down on a sofa close your eyes and then recline
this sure to be a journey cause i'm one of a kind
split craniums split atoms like uranium
splits like oh shit this a soviet gymnasium
my foes split hairs and flip chairs
while I blow big stacks in times square
the misfits back best submit to the fact
i get dough for this shit call it bisquick rap
i bring rap back to when we only spat facts
no fat cats only hungry dogs with trapped backs
spit fast hit a wack kid with whiplash
no breaks we ain't dealing out no kit kats
flow sick like riff raff
sick like a victim after dining out at dish n dat
shit that's a pretty harsh diss
like lord farquaad i'm an asinine antagonist
acting like i'm hot shit we all know that's bullshit
prolly got a complex call a psychoanalyst
i deserve a cover story published by complex
i'm complex like dna helix
my skills are once in a generation
call me rap game halley's comet BLAM
Track Name: Barbeque Rap
[intro]
This a barbecue, this this a barbecue

[hook]
everybody get your george foreman grills
this a barbecue this this a barbecue
celebrating everyone's who keeping it trill
this a barbecue this this a barbecue
making all this food so everybody gets their fill
and if your cup is empty then come get a refill
this my barbecue let's go and make some food
we can drink some brews and forget about the news
this a barbecue this this a barbecue
this a barbecue this is my barbecue!
we got kosher halal and vegan
when jeff is cooking everybody's eating!

[verse 1]
this is my barbecue we cooking up some fine meat
but I do it undercover so the cops won’t find me
I don’t carry i.d. gotta stay in hiding
I’m no chicken so please don’t fry me!
I just wanna grill me up some excellent burgers
Also gonna cook some Hebrew national frankfurters
If you wondering about desert we serving rainbow sherbet
even got you covered if you think that meat is murder
cause I’m bringing bean burgers and some salad
taste so good even the carnivores go oh my god!
This tastes so good
Why don’t they serve bean burgers in my hood?
dang that’s a pretty good point
you should make my yard your new neighborhood joint
don’t need money cause friends and food makes me happy
Burgers so great you think I worked for krabby patty
What sort of music will be at this barbecue?
You should really know the answer already dude
we’re gonna play my mixtape on repeat
Go ahead and take a seat and listen to my sweet beats!
If the weather’s rainy don’t worry man I got a tent
And I’m bringing bug spray cause that’s just some common sense
And I’m bringing sun screen Frisbees and dumplings
Dumplings? Yeah cause my heritage is Chinese!

[hook]

[verse 2]
Have I forgotten any other supplies?
I sure hope not! That would be my demise
But even if I did I know my friends will help me out
After all! That’s what being friends is all about!
And hey aren’t we all good friends
Even if we’re not we’ll just pretend
Because if you ruin my cookout today
I’ll lock you in a closet and throw the key away!
Let me get philosophical for a moment
To be or not to be that is the question
Ayo! Shut up hamlet!
Charcoal or gas that’s a real question
Man I’m just speaking honestly
Remember everyone please drink responsibly
Always have a good time Always spit a good rhyme
Always eat your spinach and your carrots fruit and broccoli!
But not at this barbecue if you don’t want to
You can have whatever you like and then some more too!
If the parties lame well at least I brought games
We can play some can jam cornhole or horseshoes!
Wow! This is such a great time
I think cnn should put this party on their headlines
Wow! Jeff is such a great cook
Please tell your friends to go and buy my new cookbook!

[outro]
This a barbecue, this this a barbecue
This a barbecue, this this a barbecue
Track Name: Existential Rap
[verse 1]
holla at me cause i'm the man (adam)
shout out to all my loving fans (imaginary)
even if i only got one (your mother)
i do this shit for more than just fun (work hard)
i am not a rabbit i won't run (updike)
can't wait for my destiny to come (beyonce)
gotta act fast thats the plan (galen rupp)
gotta make these dummies understand (education)
you can't comprehend just who i am (i'm a riddle)
i can speak in circles ceiling fans (circulation)
i dont really fuck with steely dan (aja)
i'm a hardcore a.j. feely fan (quarterback)
played for both of my two favorite teams (football)
eagles and the rams getting that cream (wu tang)
my minds off the wall like pealing paint (napoleon)
speak the truth a modern hip hop saint (yeesus)

[hook]
this song has no meaning
cause life has no meaning
i am just speaking
and no one is listening
this is a metaphor for life (life life life)
this is a metaphor for life (life life life)

[verse 2]
balling hard like my names lebron (miami)
for all of my city i put on (young jeezy)
look at all this work that i put in (vladimir)
thats the reason i'm the fucking bomb (oppenheimer)
i won't go to war to guard my pride (simba)
i'm a pacifist deep in my mind ('nam)
always stays real when in the booth (john wilkes)
mind over money that's the truth (karl marx)
tearing down this city king kong (peter jackson)
throw you in a ditch like ding dong (hostess)
powrfl up in this shit we on (avon)
enemies just plankton to feed on (spongebob)
i can't swim so i can't be a sailor (aw man)
let's bring back the freaking hartford whalers (aw yeah)
cause we gotta show love for our city (you're beautiful)
bushnell park is honestly quite pretty (the carousel!)

[hook]

[verse 3]
working on my craft because i care (sir carealot)
spit the truth and accept every dare (truth or dare)
you can't really step with my crew (crew love)
i got skills enough to kill you (ninja skills)
metaphorically i mean of course (english lit)
i don't really do physical force (gandhi)
i don't really fuck with household chores (domestic sphere)
i'm a lazy shit down to my core (core curriculum)
i am still a kid deep in my heart (terabithia)
you won't find this shit on billboard charts (ryan seacrest)
my rhymes and my beats are pretty novice (nova scotia)
i aspire to be a good artist (james joyce)
that involves always being honest (kanye west)
to myself and to my fucking audience (who?)
so i try to think before i speak (dr. seuss)
and i try to speak just what i mean (theodore geisel)

[hook]
Track Name: Big Six (ft. POWRFL)
[verse 1 - J Eazy]
i'm a nifty trickster like odysseus in a trojan horse
linguistic wiz kid best in my business this a mythical tour de force
metaphysical discourse about this shit i spit forth
rapping till i get a best new music score on pitchfork
watch the mobs come marching up my porch while armed with torches
i distort the truth and feed it to you fools in fortune cookies
i'm a little wussy no i'm a fucking wookie bro
on a roll like tootsie rolls how many licks i don't know
holding it down for my whole team getting that cream living a dream
spitting obscene the mischievous teen with a tendency to make the ladies scream
reign supreme as the king on my goldenplated seat
running this whole regime first of my kind the pre-emminent g
i'm the playa archetype that guides the hustlers way of life
got no morals so i'm on that dickhead cheney level vice
three blind mice trained to fight like musketeers at half the price
no stage fright the big six making big bucks like bank heists

[verse 2 - DFi]
man an incredible dichotomy
animalistic chaos and the god above the anarchy
still we stand united under anesthetic fallacies
can't sleep at night? ask the oommen family
but damn the camera flash ensnares the moment
stare at life through the film what we see is unimportant
break the chains like moses posing parting seven seas
live up to my namesake dfi the dynasty
its piracy patents tossed aside i would rather die
than hide inside with hypocritical
fly the skies and cry the tears of all the crimes
the strong have struck unto the pitiful
hold the hand of those that stand and stare
to the future with their roots sown deep
with force withheld and reason held dear
i would defy consciousness and sink to sleep

[verse 3 - G Money]
i ain't a poet but i'm also not a rapper
but with applause i'll turn on like the clapper
so keep clapping and keep supporting
powrfl we go hard just not in the mornings
my life is boring but in the best way
plenty of time for sleep learning and play
all day we hang out and throw sarcasm
laugh so much we all do the oommen tickle spasm
most of all though we got each others backs
if you cross on a member expect a six man attack
with the strength of three horses plus a rabid bear
there won't even be time for one more final prayer
but if you play nice then so will we
i'll be your friend just ask for g money
and if not ask for the gunmaster
i'll hide your bones in your home's plaster!

[verse 4 - Ishi Packin']
farmington river brought to life by the rain
turns into a demon exercising its reign
turns into a god the egyptian anubis
place your soul on a scale judged by his prudence
under the light your most vulnerable state
your fate at stake place your body on a plate
devoured by ammit should've lived your life better
your heart turned black all diseased like a leper
packin gets real see more carside crescent
can't even swim should've learned my lesson
think i spit blasphemy but i believe in one god
praise to the most high the one who is not flawed
tell me no excuse and my music is haram
we may disagree but i offer you salaam
learn the quran and live by his criteria
keep me in your prayers along with egypt and syria

[verse 5 - Big Sexi]
words like bullets hitting you with a barrage
bigger than a nicki minaj booty collage
stick my car in your garage disappear mirage
over seas intricacy my mind like the taj
my style is eclectic your girl is neglected
so i get inventive and she gets infected
in fact youre a rat send you home without a hat
and i aint sweet no more cause i used to be fat
silly rabbit see ha ha tricks are for kids
your getting tricked my lolly gets licked
by your first pick while youre picking zits
im in your girl having fits and it barely fits
my jeans are excessive my mind is obsessive
and if you listen now you'll find that i'm impressive
with the batman i'll kill you in the dark night
we so powrfl win this war without a fight

[verse 6 - K Oomz]
oommie hate you but i hate me too
the international douchebag, heathrow
bitches kneeling before me, knees blue
powrfl till i die, bleed true
two words describe me awesome and awesome
had three fans yesterday and then i lost em
im like who you think are? fucking chelsea clinton?
barnie stinson paris hilton they dont get my vision
say hello to my lil friend i got none
only big fellas monsters and goblins
i toil in the shadow darkness is my ally
rock that bane swag but im not a bad guy
i broke bad once now i break bread with you
virtuous like anne hutch you know its true
your reign ended in a vote of no confidence
i took over the throne and now live in full opulence
Track Name: Flexin
[intro]
i be flexing
i be flexing
motherfucker
i be flexing

[hook]
every single day i'm out here flexing
i be getting green no salad dressing
if you ain't with my team yo head need checking
cause we run this whole damn town no question
every single day i'm out here flexing
i be getting green no salad dressing
if you ain't with my team yo head need checking
because we run this whole goddamn town no question

[verse 1]
every single day i'm out here flexing
pull up in my red solara revving
cause i got that sexy v6 engine
peanut butter bananas toast for breakfast
shout out to AI cause he's a balla
respect for all the years he gave the sixers
that's my city of birth philadelphia
so much murder got me helter skelter
listen to a lot of gangster rap shit
fucking with that east atlanta trap shit
i be winning blue ribbons like pabst shit
i be fucking crazy like some batshit
but i'm no vigilante i'm no bruce wayne
honestly i'm more similar to 2 chainz
and i don't need no water i'm a cactus
i'm a franchise player don't talk no practice

[hook]

[verse 2]
every single day i'm out here flexing
i'm one of the best boy that's no question
i be on my grind twenty four seven
aka i never stop for resting
i like eating chocolate easter bunnies
but not as much as i like stacking money
your rhymes like stale cookies man they crummy
my rhymes like fresh cookies man they yummy
shout out to toonami from the old days
i be getting too damn old like stone age
i'm a hitta like i'm playing croquet
i'm a knitta like i'm doing crochet
i can knock your head off like a toupe
i could knock your teeth out like a toothache
i could beat you up like making souffle
i'ma knock the whole world out like doomsday

[hook]

[outro]
i be flexing
i be flexing
i be flexing i be flexing
i be flexing
Track Name: Nineteen Eighty-Four
[intro]
“It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking

thirteen.”

[hook]
nsa on my phone what am i gonna say now
big brother in my home what am i gonna say now
who's listening who's recording what am i gonna say now
what am i gonna say when it's 1984 now
1984 now 1984 now
2013 but it's 1984 now
1984 now 1984 now
2013 but it's 1984 now

[verse 1]
what am i gonna say now can't talk on my phone now
all movements are monitored so i'm never alone now
who's looking through the webcam on the other side?
facetime was for two but now it's broadcast nationwide
my life is mostly jekyll but we all gotta little hyde
but the government can see both sides even if we stay inside
don't wanna go outside google cars on every corner
taking street view pictures of me each and every morning
man i wanna mourn the death of my privacy
if obama's listening i say fuck democracy
capitalists in the building please stand up
now get your fucking hands in these diamond handcuffs

[interlude]
“War is peace.
Freedom is slavery.
Ignorance is strength.”

[verse 2]
what are you gonna do now that you have finally found out
what should have been obvious and clear from the very start now
running round with your smart phones texting thousand times a day
putting your life on the internet without having anything real to

say
share your profile with your friends, friends of friends and then

they friends
everybody wanna get their quote unquote life on the internet
what's the difference if it's getting accessed by the government
honestly obamas prolly laughing or he's bored to death
selfies in the bathroom, preteen beauty pagents
this the life you're feeding to the secret service agents
get your fawkes masks kids time for action no more coma
throw away your soda cause the koolaids made by mk ultra

[interlude]
"if you want to keep a secret
you must also hide it from yourself"
"and now a word from the president"

[verse 3 - Obama]
what am i gonna do now now that the public's found out
would've gotten away with it too it weren't for that loud mouth
chasing edward snowden for committing fucking treason
cuz my administration always does things for a reason
yeah i love my drone strikes update my list everr night
clinton called the kill on tupac blamed it all on suge knight
i sleep with a night light cause i got them night terrors
war on terror got america acting like a white terror
p.s. don't blame all this b.s. on me
ain't my fault that the law allows for super PACs
and the patriot act was supported by the people
so when we talk complicity just know we fucking equal

[hook]

[outro]
“Now I will tell you the answer to my question. It is this. The Party seeks power entirely for its own sake. We are not interested in the good of others; we are interested solely in power, pure power. What pure power means you will understand presently. We are different from the oligarchies of the past in that we know what we are doing. All the others, even those who resembled ourselves, were cowards and hypocrites. The German Nazis and the Russian Communists came very close to us in their methods, but they never had the courage to recognize their own motives. They pretended, perhaps they even believed, that they had seized power unwillingly and for a limited time, and that just around the corner there lay a paradise where human beings would be free and equal. We are not like that. We know what no one ever seizes power with the intention of relinquishing it. Power is not a means; it is an end. One does not establish a dictatorship in order to safeguard a revolution; one makes the revolution in order to establish the dictatorship. The object of persecution is persecution. The object of torture is torture. The object of power is power. Now you begin to understand me.”
― George Orwell, 1984
Track Name: Death of a Salesman (ft. Ishi Packin')
[hook]
death of a salesman we all willy loman
capitalist nightmares sending me bad omens
stuck in traffic chasing the american dream
commidified things cars girls and bling
i'm living my life but what is my life
life's a rigged game i'm still rolling these dice
if this worlds a test i wonder if i'll pass
will anyone remember me when i finally pass

[verse 1 - Ishi Packin]
look at my life but what am i worth?
consumerisms the lord, call me the serf
peasant life is pleasure or is it just pain?
wait till the land goes all up in flames
lost that job - what to do now?
"don't worry honey, we'll make it somehow"
does not believe me packs her bags and leaves
leaves beautiful in autumn, but gone by the winter
took the kids with her, and found another mister
but damn i really miss her and just wanna kiss her
see her in the market, ask her to come back
finally agrees but i still cant relax
i become some corporate slave like whats paid like what gives?
give your life for it all, whose wife, whose kids?
not mine, spent all my time in the cubicle more than nine to five
twelve hour days. dont feel alive.

[hook]

[verse 2 - J Eazy]
look at all this money that is in my pocket
hundreds stacked on thousands don't care if i drop it
cause i got more waiting in my bank
look up to the lord but i'm not giving thanks
i be working hard 9 to 5 plus over time
so i can afford everything i want to buy
rolex watches lamborghinis skinny women in bikinis
high on coke low on life drunk off thirteen appletinis
back to back shifts my boss don't give a shit
i'm living by the line so i take another hit
to all those who listening read between the lines
i'm losing my mind i'm losing my mind
i need another chance give me back my soul
everything i touch has started turning into gold
i'm on autopilot set to self destruct
i'm playing blackjack but i know i'm gonna bust

[outro]
what is my life? what is my life?
lifes a rigged game. lifes a rigged game
im still rolling these dice
rolling these dice
rolling these
dice
dice
dice
dice
Track Name: Breathe In, Breathe Out
[hook]
breathe in
breathe out
this is everything that
life should be about
breathe in
breathe out
this is everything that
life is all about

[verse 1]
i'm rapping cause i'm passionate bout spitting facts and living fast
chilling in a cabin but i'm feeling like i'm in a mansion
living big like cinemax running like a maniac mcgee
oh gee solid gold like c3po
check this flow as i go in
hot as sin but cold as winds thats blowing out in lake michigan
making fools of many men my skills nearly unlimited
i'm a wanted citizen cause i keep killing beats again
sorry that i can't control the deadly force with which i rap
my mind is so intricate like dungeons bring a minimap
playing with my kitty cat lawrence is his given name
ridiculously awesome unlike ishaq's cat whos pretty lame
nah i'm only kidding simba's really chill for real
i'm silly like a billy goat that's riding on a ferris wheel
keep my tricks concealed i stay slippery banana peels
keep it real my achilles heel is my achilles heel

[hook]

[verse 2]
i'm tryna create meaning in my life although its pretty hard
but i think i'll find the way if i just look into my heart
i don't need a fast car black card or bodyguard
i just need to rap relax in someones backyard
kicking back with ishy pats, k oomz g roell d fi big sexi
powrfl a walking party all we need is more confetti
get the bottles ready cause we popping till the cemetary
we so hot it feels like it's july when its mid-february
this shit ain't hereditary work hard get paid
i don't need a secretary but id like a a french maid
honestly i just wanna parler some francais
maybe ask her out to people watch at a cafe
make the fadeaway but i will never fadeaway
i'm making beats on 808s and i'm a beast like killer mike
wield the mic like divine right let me be your ray of light
i'll be a beacon in your life to guide your way through gloomy nights